Research indicates that more than one-third of Americans describe themselves as lonely or socially isolated.[1] Loneliness is a quiet epidemic that has become increasingly problematic in recent years and ballooned during the pandemic. Researchers have long known the adverse impact loneliness has on depression and anxiety and that it increases the likelihood of medical vulnerabilities. Loneliness can impair health by increasing levels of stress hormones in the body, leading to a wide variety of medical problems. [2] The good news is, that having just one or two friendships can dramatically decrease loneliness and feelings of isolation. Interestingly, the statistics on loneliness come at a time when new research indicates that more than forty percent of self-professed evangelicals only attend church once a year or less. [3] So, what role can the local church play in reducing loneliness?
The Bible has a lot to say about relationships. Early in the book of Genesis, God said, “It is not good for man to be alone” (Gen. 2:18). In this context, God was referring to marriage, but we know that God calls some people to singleness and others find themselves widowed or divorced. Regardless of our status, it is clear that it is not good for us to be isolated from other people. Having “friends” on social media cannot replace sharing a meal or having a conversation over a cup of coffee. Netflix is a poor substitute for engaging in other people’s lives. For believers, the local church plays a pivotal role in addressing the problem of loneliness. What do I mean by that?
Read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation, and you’ll never find a single instance when God called someone to go it alone. There are no spiritual hermits in Scripture. We are created to be in a relationship with God and other people. Perhaps you’re one of the millions of people suffering from loneliness, or maybe your social ties aren’t as strong as you’d like them to be. Perhaps you stopped attending church during the pandemic, and you’ve not returned, or maybe you’ve never attended church. Here are three suggestions:
- Commit to the local church. I can almost feel some of you cringe as I type this. I know several people who have quit attending church because they got their feelings hurt or were disappointed. I’ve been there, and I don’t want to minimize what happened to you. But you can’t let anyone or anything rob you of your place of worship and relationships with other believers. Biblical community is too important to forfeit over a dispute. And keep in mind, if you are active in any type of group for any length of time and you will be disappointed—it’s part of life. Join a weekly bowling league, and I guarantee that if you stay long enough, you’ll eventually get irritated. All human beings are flawed, including Christians—and sometimes we hurt each other’s feelings. Despite this reality, we can’t drop out of the local church because it is the primary place we engage in worship and discipleship. Make the local church a non-negotiable. I believe this is an area where it’s appropriate to be stubborn.
- Join a Small Group Bible Study. Depending on the size of the congregation, it’s possible to attend a worship service every week and not get to know anyone at your church. That’s one of the reasons why it’s crucial to be active in a small group. Over the last twenty years, I’ve met several of my closest friends in small group Bible studies. Not only do small groups provide the opportunity to grow in your knowledge of Scripture, but they also offer an atmosphere where you can get to know people, share struggles and successes, and become active in each other’s lives. If you stick with it, you’ll find it well worth your time and effort.
- Find a Place to Serve. The benefits of serving are two-fold. First, it allows you to be of help in your community, and there are people everywhere who are in need. Secondly, it provides an outlet for you to do meaningful work and connect with other people—which goes a long way in confronting the problem of loneliness.
I can’t promise you’ll never be lonely. But engaging in biblical community increases our social connections and is an active affront on loneliness. In every sense, it gives us a fighting chance.
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[1] https://www.artandhealing.org/older-adults-loneliness-fact-sheet/?gclid=Cj0KCQjwmuiTBhDoARIsAPiv6L8uAyog5Fuj2U5_uF0jqs_gFn9527UQuRnjfQ6K_LsaIrNIIdoBAXcaAoMjEALw_wcB.
[2] https://www.artandhealing.org/older-adults-loneliness-fact-sheet/?gclid=Cj0KCQjwmuiTBhDoARIsAPiv6L8uAyog5Fuj2U5_uF0jqs_gFn9527UQuRnjfQ6K_LsaIrNIIdoBAXcaAoMjEALw_wcB.
[3] https://relevantmagazine.com/faith/church/new-data-suggests-over-40-percent-of-self-identified-evangelicals-attend-church-once-a-year-or-less/.
