A Big Birthday Prayer

I am turning fifty in a couple of days. On the one hand, it’s shocking. Fifty is a big number that arrived while I was doing other things. It kind of feels like out-of-town guests who arrived at my front door two days early. I was aware, but I thought I had more time. On the other hand, fifty feels exactly right. I’ve already been all the ages between one and forty-nine. So, why not fifty?

This milestone birthday has caused me to contemplate my life so far. I’ve asked myself questions like, “If I keep doing what I’m doing right now, will I like where I am in ten years? What is working, and what do I need to do differently?” And turning fifty has motivated me to pray for some new things. Our culture has changed a lot in the last ten years, so it’s right that my prayer life reflects those changes and challenges. Here are a few things I’m praying for as I head into my fifth decade:

• Wisdom to know when to speak up and when to stay quiet. Everyone has a platform on social media now. In some ways, that’s a good thing. But our public discourse is loud and disorienting and there’s a temptation to believe we need to have an opinion about everything and share it with anyone who will listen. I’d like to avoid that way of thinking. Whether I’m speaking with a family member, friend, or a stranger online—I pray God will give me the wisdom to know when to speak up or when to stay quiet. I want my words to help and never hurt.

• Thick skin and a tender heart. If I wanted to, I could find a reason every day of the week to be outraged and offended. But here’s the thing—I don’t want to be and I’m guessing you don’t either. I also don’t want to stick my head in the sand and ignore what’s going on in the world. So, I’ m praying God will give me a disposition that allows me to be alert and aware without succumbing to cynicism. Jesus warned of a time when “the love of many will grow cold” (Matt. 24:12). I want my love for God and people to burn white hot—but I want a disposition that is even-keeled and non-reactive.

• Awe for God. Life gets monotonous when I lose my awe of God. I/we were designed with an innate desire to worship, so if we aren’t worshipping God, you can bet you’re worshipping a counterfeit god that will leave us unsatisfied and wishing for more. What makes this cycle tricky is that sometimes we might not even realize we’ve fallen into this trap—and without intending to, it becomes life as we know it. Perhaps you recognize this cycle—you are feeling restless, so you buy something you don’t need, engage in mindless scrolling, or spend a whole day binge-watching. And then, before you know it—these occasional habits turn into a lifestyle. I don’t want to live that way. Call me crazy, but I want to be like the men on the road to Emmaus. After they had been with Jesus they said, “Weren’t our hearts burning within us while he was talking with us on the road and explaining the Scriptures to us?” (Luke 24:32). In my fifth decade, I want to walk with Jesus and study the Scriptures until my heart to burns in my chest. I guarantee you, that beats anything we’ll find scrolling.

I’m curious to know, what are you praying for in this season of your life? Leave a comment and let us know. It might be something someone wants to add to their own prayers.  And if this article has been helpful, feel free to text/or email to a friend.